Monday, November 12, 2012

Lost Sight

Lost Sight

On Saturday, I rode my bike to Pilates. When I arrived home, my eyeglasses and case were missing.  I quickly retraced my steps and found the case in the middle of an intersection. Elation. As I approached it, I saw the shards of lens around the squashed case. Despair.

When I finished Pilates, I sat down to put back on my sneakers before riding back home.  As I put my wallet in my shorts and my glasses case in the pocket of my zip up jacket, a thought ran through my head “which one do you want to lose?” It was not a loud statement, just part of the constant chatter in my brain.  I thought “replacing all of the things in my wallet would be a real pain.” I continued placing my wallet in my shorts and my glasses in my jacket.  I didn’t think about it again until I got home and realized my glasses were not in my jacket. 

Could I have actually listened to that moment of clarity and made a different choice? I could have chosen to put my wallet in my jacket pocket and lose it instead.  I did make a choice: a “this” or “that” choice.  If I had listened, could I have made a choice to not lose either: a “this” and “that” choice? 

I suspect I have moments of foresight all of the time. It is part of the constant dialogue in my head.  I probably listen more often than not.  I only notice when I don’t heed the suggestion and something calamitous occurs.

Could I incorporate this way of knowing more into my life? Can I listen more? Can I incorporate my insight with my intellect? Can I choose to live in the opposites of “this” and “that”, rather than in the consequence and loss of a “this” or “that” choice?

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